The Ties That Bind Us

There are many things that bind a family together. Apart from the usual family things, there are small things that hold together our conversation and help us avoid those awkward moments during dinners. For instances, my Father’s sense of humor made us one of the most envied family when we grew up. It is our shared love for music, especially Southern Gospel/ Country Gospel music that keep my conversation going with my big Brother. On the other hand, Robert Ludlum keep us going with my other Brother.

All of the above are shared interest, so how about personal troubles. Sometimes situations like death, personal tragedy and other unusual situations make us stronger. The troubles one is going through, the problem the other faced, trials and humiliation, etc, can all be the bridge to a much stronger family.

As I often said, my family is far from dysfunctional even thought there are many resemblances. But these past few weeks had turned our world topsy-turvy and I’m no longer sure what is going-on in my family. The most unlikely situations took place, and totally changed our stands.

A few weeks ago, my big brother went through a nightmare, that too publicly. I thought this could be the end and feared he will never recover from it. But I thought it wrong, not only he comes out much stronger, the whole family comes out much stronger.

When it comes to big brother, we always put him in a different category, because he’s a little more adventurous than the rest of us. But when it comes to this ‘nightmare’, we were more outraged than him. We called each other and consoled each other. We talked like we never talked before, and we discussed things like we never discussed things before, and we all realize that he had been our inspiration all along.

I often thought he is the one responsible for breaking my family apart, and putting us in the situation where we are now, and I’m blubbering not without justification. But he’s the central of our universe right now and I pray he will do so in the future as well.

There are other changes, positive changes that are nothing sort of ‘miracles’ happening in my family after that ‘nightmare’, but I’m not going to this easily give-up my ‘pessimism’ tag, so I’m going to ‘wait and watch’ before I holler about them.

Still, I’m happy. We are far from the prefect family, but we all are happy with the way things turn out. It will sound a little ironic or apt to say ‘thank you’ for this ‘nightmare’, but I definitely am thankful for the changes it brought about.

T h a n k Y o u ! ! !

Secondhand Drinking

Secondhand Drinking: n. A negative effect that a drinker has on a non-drinker.

I was so irritated to stumble through this word last night I just wanted to pull-out my few remaining strand of hair. All along there had been a single word that could save me an entire unpleasant decade trying to explain my foul moods and nobody tell me of its existence..?

My irritation was fuelled by the realization that I no longer have a use for this new found word. On the other hand I’m also glad that I have no use for it. But the problem now is, my moody phases which I always attributed to Secondhand drinking still continue and I have to find a new single word that would explain it all, and I haven’t stumble upon it yet.

If you are a little confused by what I wrote about, it is like this. My father is a total teetotaler and I take after my father. But my Brother used to drink and many times he brought home his drinking friends and they would all get drunk. I can’t stand any drunk around me; they can only topple my mood. In fact, I often see drunken people only as a lesser human (i.e. about 50% functioning human).

Now, you want to admit it or not, we all suffer from secondhand drinking knowingly or unknowingly. Be it cleaning after someone’s vomit or being left red-faced by your friend’s drunken stupor in the street, or unknowingly inhaling Class-A Carcinogen emitted by alcohol in the air you breathe. That’s nothing.

For many, secondhand drinking has a lifelong impact. For instance, a friend’s education was interrupted mid-way because of his father’s heavy drinking. His not being able to achieve his optimum capability and the subsequent consequences like not having a job, impregnating a neighboring jobless girl, having more babies, not able to make ends meet and never able to climb the social ladder, etc. can all be traced back to his father’s drinking. That’s second hand drinking…

There are also high chances that secondhand drinking is responsible for your friend being categorized as Physically Handicapped. If your alcoholic neighbor is giving you sleepless night, or you are victims of car accidents, assault, fights, stupid arguments –then chances are high that you too are one in the list. Say, a Bollywood actor ran over some beggar sleeping on the pavement, their plight: secondhand drinking! In one sentence, any negative effect caused by drinking to its environment is called secondhand drinking.

Well, by now, I hope you understand what secondhand drinking is. It indeed is a serious issue that should be taken up by many housewives, and some husbands, of course. But for my poor spirit’s sake, let’s cut-out the serious part as I don’t want to sound like those moral teacher, and let’s put some twist to the above paragraph.

Section A
Q. Why don’t you get a good job?
A. My parents can’t afford to school me, they are alcoholic. (or Secondhand Drinking)
Q. Did you rough-up the neighbor’s girl?
A. No school means I got nothing else to do (or Secondhand Drinking)
Q. Why do you try to commit suicide?
A. My parents drink everything (Secondhand Drinking)

Section B
Q. Why don’t you get a good job?
A. I got kicked out (‘cos he’s alcoholic)
Q. Did you rough-up the neighbor’s girl?
A. I was Drunk (oops!)
Q. Why do you try to commit suicide?
A. I got nothing to drink.

Well, I hope you find the difference –see, the difference is there’s no difference at all. They are the same. The bottom line is -Alcohol not only harms the user, but those surrounding the user, including the unborn child, children, family members, and the sufferers of crime, violence and drink-driving accidents, so it definitely is a serious issues that need to be tackled. If smoking can be banned, why not alcohol… Secondhand drinking wrecks more homes, more marriages, and more lives than smoking.


For More:

http://speakeasyforum.com/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/518607732/m/8891070791
http://www.purdue.edu/UNS/html3month/2006/060814.T.Chester.drinking.html
http://www.spiked-online.com/index.php/site/article/324/